BRING IT ON

Without going into detail, the Devil patiently awaited my return home from "Deeper Still". In preparation for Nicaragua I knew his presence would be made known sooner than later. His spiritual attack is among me and in an instant I have found myself in his wilderness.

Dios es Bueno!!! I know that keeping my faith in the Lord means being puddy in his hands. If Play Doe is what I need to become , by all means...

I'm decked out in armor Satan....BRING IT ON

What she lacked in Brains, she make up for in Compassion

Everyone who knows me would agree, I am slightly on the silly side. I wish I could blame that on the cracked skull I was given during a tubing accident nearly 9 years ago which required a trip to the ER and about 10 staples. Unfortunately, I don't know for sure that is the case. I did finish high school with a GPA of 4.25, and still have a pretty high cumulative GPA in college, but I can admit... I'm a ditz.

After a talk I just had with my mother in law, I started to think. What legacy do I want to leave behind? Do I want to be known as the girl that had a big brain, or the girl that had a big heart? That's something I wont have to sit and ponder for long. Being some sort of educational prodigy is not going to bring Glory to God. On the other hand, having a heart that spews with love, will.
So I hope my tomb stone reads... What she lacked in brains, she made up for in compassion.

Life of a Pilots Wife

When Matt and I first met I was intrigued in the idea of dating a pilot. When we moved to Florida so that he could pursue his life as a Professional Pilot, I was honored to be the first to partake in his cross country flight. Soon though, that excitement turned to fear, as I realized I was not cut out for co pilot position. That's right, in the plane, midway between Cedar Key and Daytona Beach is where I proceeded to throw up all over Matt's Abercrombie and Fitch sweater (that he so graciously offered me as a sick bag).

That my friends, was nearly 8 years ago, and also the last time I accepted responsibility of sitting in the cockpit of an airplane...until yesterday. It had been weeks since I had the chance to spend the day with my husband. When he asked if I would ride along with him to pick up some Friends of ours from the Bahamas, I jumped at the idea. In the plane I threw myself and marched straight up to the cockpit and took a seat. Yes, I thought twice about it, but I was there for one reason and one reason only, to spend time with my hubby, and that I couldn't do from the backseat.

Instantly I gained a whole new respect for the career my husband chose. As we prepared for departure I heard this man from air traffic control ramble off some gibberish about altitude, altimeter settings, radio headings blah blah blah. Where I would of had to say, ok, slow down, could you please repeat that, I haven't got a pen and paper in hand, my husband dialed in the appropriate numbers in their appropriate positions amongst the hundreds of instruments and buttons, and then repeated it back to him without batting an eyelash. I was impressed to say the least, and on the other hand... lost, so what do I do, stick my head in a magazine and zone far far away from the moment of take off.

Before I new it, we were 17,000 feet in the air and in the middle of the ocean. Matt and I were chatting away taking pictures and goofing off, all behind the "wheel" of an airplane. I was fine as long as I looked from side to side and not out the front windshield (which was not particularly hard since I couldn't see over the dash). He then tells me we are minutes from landing so I get brave and strain myself to look ahead, bad mistake. In front of me were mountains of clouds. Not those pretty clouds that you lay in a field and configure cute little shapes out of, I mean the ones you take cover from. I guess Matt could see the intense fear stricken expression ( hard to miss), because in a calm and somewhat protective voice he tells me "its ok, I'll just fly through the holes". I felt like Jasmine when Aladdin took her on a magic carpet ride, only thing missing was the words to "A Whole New World".

We got there safe and sound, had enough time to take the golf cart to the Pool Bar for a bite to eat, a quick dip in the Caribbean Sea and off we went back home.

So the point of my story... solely to brag about my husband. Yes he does have a great job that has become his sole priority, but he is also the hardest working man I know. He takes peoples lives into his hands every day and never fails to bring them home safely.

Lord I ask that you protect my husband as he soars with the eagles and is guided through the holes of heaven. Thank you for giving me the Life of this Pilots Wife.

Making a Difference

As I was driving home from work today, I had the "pleasure" of drafting behind an 18 wheeler that was carrying what appeared to be 53 feet of recycled material (aka trash). Problem is, he wasn't successful in transporting it from point A to point B, unless point B consisted of the road he was traveling on. At this time my mind begins to wonder. What can I do to stop this situation.

Short of running a Mack Truck off the road in my 4 door Accord, or pulling over and backtracking (who knows how many miles) to collect the garbage he has just ridden the world with... nothing. I had no cell phone, My hands were tied.

A few minutes later, my mind departs from the (not so pleasant) thoughts I was having of this truck driver, to the lyrics on the radio. Like a lesson from God, the words of Jack Johnson's "With My Own Two Hands" filled the car.

It goes something like this...http://youtube.com/watch?v=2OldXKvuljs&feature=related

I know I'm no superhero, but God did give me the ability of Using My Own Two Hands. With them, I hope to make a difference.

Silence Speaks Volumes

Some of the most precious moments of my life were spent in silence. My earliest child hood memory was a night when I was 3 years old. My father tip toed into my room at 2 am and woke me up. He asked me to come outside, he had something to show me. Without saying a word I followed him out, and then he pointed to the heavens. It was the clearest night sky I have ever seen. Filled with shooting stars, fireflies and flashes of lightning, I sat there in awe of the world that surrounded me. Everything so perfect, everything so peaceful. And then I looked up as my dad glanced over at me. Not a word was spoken, but his love for me in that moment was radiant.

One of my biggest struggles as a Christian is keeping my quiet time with God consistent. To be honest with you, I don't know that I even have quiet time with the Lord. I talk to him all day long in my prayers, but I never find myself patiently waiting to hear that small, still voice. I ask so many questions and never hear the answer, because I don't give him the opportunity to reveal the truth.

I'm so blessed that God is patient. He is nothing like my 1st grade teacher that wouldn't answer a question that had been asked more than once because you should have listened the first time.

Lord I am so thankful for the love that you have for me. I thank you for allowing me to lean on you whenever I need. I thank you for giving me the thoughts of your heart, and I ask that through my Silence you will Speak Volumes.

The Gift of Laughter

I believe that one of the best traits a person can have is the ability to make others laugh.
What I love most, is that laughter from one, often provokes laughter from another. It's contagious. You don't even need to have heard what was said. All you need to hear is the gleeful giggle of another to make you chuckle.

I learned today that there is a job out there I never knew existed. Gelotology...the study of humor and laughter, as well as the effects it has on the human body. Laughter is a gift I never before thought to pray for until now.

Last year I had the opportunity to partake in a medical mission trip to Costa Rica. While I was there I met Byron. Though he did not speak English and I did not speak Spanish, he became one of the most memorable parts of my trip. Why... we both play thumb wars and we both speak laughter. He made me smile, and left an everlasting memory in my heart. There are thousands of languages and hundreds of thousand of dialects, but this is universal.

So as I prepare to leave for Managua, Nicaragua, I will not only pray for the courage to share the Lord , but also my ability to make others laugh. After all, there is no better joy than the gift of laughter. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3O8ML-LvSY

Realizations of growing OLD

So it seems to hit quite suddenly. For me the Epiphany came when I was rummaging through pics on Facebook of old High school friends. Scanning through photos I realized ...we're all grown up now. No more excuses of being young and dumb. Even worse is to be old and dumb, because with age comes wisdom, right? Where is the wisdom I was to be granted as a consolation prize to these wrinkles?

It's no secret that I have been suffering from a quarter life crisis for over a year now. I can only pray that God convicts me of this sooner than later, and that I will again be confident in the life that I lead, and where I stand at this stage. Problem with this is, I'm currently behind. Being behind in life is not like running late to work. You can't just step on the gas petal to make up those minutes you spent kissing your husband goodbye.

So whats a girl to do, (or should I say women)? I'll tell you what I need to do. STOP COMPARING MYSELF TO OTHERS. I have dwelt long enough on this mountain. If there was no timeline, I wouldn't be behind. But who invented this timeline...I DID! I am my own worst enemy. I can't think about what people think of me. I have to remember God has started to work in me and will not stop until I am complete. He has a plan , and though I may not see where he is taking me, I have faith that it is somewhere that I want to be.

Lord I pray for strength today, for I know you are stretching my faith. Please give me the serenity to accept the things I can not change, courage to change what I can and wisdom to know the difference, for I have just realized, I'm growing old.

Even those who are surrounded by people are lonely

In a quest for self discovery and a goal to have a Heart like His, I've spent the past few days in contemplation of life. Problem lies with having answers to questions I haven't even asked myself. I can tell you what I don't want. I don't want to be alone.

The rain is falling and in this moment I feel ok with being in the house accompanied only by my dog and the sound of music . Why only now is it ok, I feel its normal. I some times think God created storms so that people would stop what they were doing and appreciate that moment. Why is it that I don't enjoy the company of myself? I often hear others say they wish they could have time to themselves. I on the other hand am on the verge of becoming a hermit (Not by choice I mind you).

So I want to stand in grace and take this time to appreciate all that I have, even if it isn't company. I have Christ in my heart and though there are times when I fear that isn't enough, I have to surround myself in knowing He is all that I need, my El Shaddai. After all, there are those that don't know Christ and though they may be surrounded by people, they still find themselves in loneliness.